once upon a time............

..... in the far away land of Alberta, there was this cruel and nasty couple that abused horses, so as in all good faerie tales ... along came some towns people and reported them to the SPCA, well you know how these faerie tales go; the knight in shining armor (SPCA) showed up and stopped the evil couple... yup these people got showed real good by the SPCA. Yes sirree the SPCA gave these people heck! Not hell even but I think they maybe scolded them well not very hard or effective they didn't want to hurt feelings, even though these people are regulars in the complaint department of the SPCA' but they did not even get fines.... just heck. WOW. About as effective as a fly swatter against a bear.

Now back to the tale.....then because all the nasty caring and concerned people who wanted to help the horses put pressure on this couple, the couple decided to turn the horses out to pasture and let them run free with the rest of the herd. Now isn't this where I am supposed to say ... the story ends well and they lived happily ever after.... right?

No this is the twisted ending to keep us all in suspense. The stud horses they let out were so under weight they could barely keep alive... but now they have been turned into a herd of Mares open and willing.... and these poor studs will probably allow mother nature to take over and I expect these poor creatures to breed themselves to death.

I guess it's better than dying in a 12 by 12 pen with no water at 30 degrees heat or freezing to death with no shelter, I am sure though the end will come. We know the Morgan association is aware of this couple through another concerned friend, and they have done as little as the SPCA they haven't even sanctioned the couple... I guess in this faerie tale everyone isn't happy ever after .. but the authorities are because they don't have to do anything and it will all blow away, they are just horses anyway right...

Well; that's not how all the people that have tried so hard to save these wonderful horses feel; but we do feel betrayed and let down, again, remember those poor souls The Rescue One Hundred Society had two years ago ... over 100 dead and dying horses and that's after the ones needed to got put down were taken care of. Well unlike good faerie tales these horses are doomed but I pray at least that these studs have a quick death... not a slow one.. at least that is what it seems from where this cowboy sits.

Capital Ex

Every once in awhile I wonder about stupidity, and just to be sure I was not contributing to stupidity I looked up the word. First, I was surprised not to see my picture or those of some of my old friends. The Webster’s online dictionary’s first definition was “A poor ability to understand or to profit from experience.” Man sounds like my life or maybe my lifestyle from time to time. For example my sons and many of those that care about me, think I am too old to break colts that buck. I despite the rods pins and various staples and surgeries continue to break colts that like to buck, so I guess I can fall into the stupidity category.

Every once in awhile and not often enough to be of note; the wheels and gears get stuck in my head. Usually they get stuck on things that I find fall into the stupidity category. One such thing that has been rattling around up there for years and kind of eating away at my cranium, is the destruction of Klondike days and it’s replacement event the big nothing, or should we say Capital X.

The other day I was sitting in my office on the corner of Jasper Avenue and 109 Street when all of a sudden three fighter jets flew over, very impressive. Then it hit me; Edmonton’s non event was beginning. The Capital Zero, no sorry the Capital X had started with the parade. Despite the millions spent by the Northlands folks to promote the event, when you ask anybody they say if they are being kind , that it is an absolute dud. Kids relate it to the midway, but beyond that ask anyone and you will get the same answer, “I don’t Know” sometimes added by it’s the fair. So what the heck happened?

In my opinion it was one of those classic control and greed stories. Growing up before the Klondike days was systematically dismantled, it was a well talked about and exciting event. I remember my Mom, Aunts and Grandmother working and planning for months as to their costumes and what events they would take in. As a kid there was always something to do, from the local malls, pancake breakfasts and all sorts of small events all over the city. The Sour Dough Raft Race was so exciting and was coupled with events like the Lumber Jack competition, and the Promenade all off the midway site. Now understand if a hotel has a daylong event in its parking lot, or a raft race is along a river and draws thousands of people picnicking and watching, or my goodness people are just milling about at a local cafe featuring honky-tonk music how are we ever going to get those people to our precious grounds so we can pick their pockets. It’s important for them to come to the grounds so we can sell them on our ten dollar beer, and eight dollar hot dogs, not to mention the gate charge.

I remember the Klondike days dismantling began by some key people saying the event isn’t a true to life event, we weren’t the gold rush. Maybe not but am I wrong the theme was fun and I thought all those people on route to the gold rush came through Edmonton, as gateway to north. Then the Klondike Association was scooped up and Northlands took over. I remember a fellow involved in one of the off midway events telling me that since the K-Days association was eliminated his hotel was discouraged from having an event. He said it was not seen as community spirited to promote what he had for years promoted which was a pancake breakfast and day long activities at his hotel.

Getting back to the stupid part; I believe the organizers of this nothing event have failed, and they have “A poor ability to understand or to profit from experience.” So, unless you really like midways and Carnies and noise and all that, you probably won’t like the Capital X. The Northlands group are very much about control, they want everyone to be at that ridiculous fair ground. In my humble opinion they really should be removed of the control on the event, and new vibrant organizers should be installed for perhaps the rebirth of Klondike days. Makes me cringe when Calgary makes us look silly by the city wide involvement they get for the Stampede. We should never have let a facilities organization destroy a fun city wide event and all I want to know is; What the Heck is Capital X. At least that’s what it looks like from where I sit

Douglas Stacey is a humorist and a writer. And can be reached at crossingrafterranch@yahoo.ca